Tag Archives: toothpicks

Dentists

 

As soon as I open my mouth and they start talking, I know that deep down dentists wished they were engineers:

bridges, root canals, dental dams, braces/railroad tracks, drills, and even toothpicks!

They can’t fool me!

 

note: I think the worst thing I’ve tried to eat while my mouth was still frozen from the dentists were waffles. You never really know where the waffle ends and the inside of your mouth begins.

double note: opening my mouth and having someone else start talking makes me feel like a dummy … a ventriloquist’s dummy.

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Today #119

Today was like watching all the coming attractions before the movie … but the movie never started.

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Hard Core

 

Do you know who is hard core?

People who bring their own condiments and sauces to restaurants: horseradish, Worcestershire sauce, ketchup, tabasco sauce, relish, mustard, BBQ sauce, all spice,…

That takes dedication, planning, and possibly shot tastebuds.

Maybe they carry the stuff in their car’s glove compartment just in case: insurance papers, emergency flare, tabasco sauce, …

I’m going to start doing this … with toothpicks.

I’m not really a toothpick person, but I want something I can pull out of my pocket so the ketchup guy doesn’t think I’m soft.

And nothing says hard core tough guy more than a toothpick!

… well maybe an icepick does, but I don’t get ice stuck in my teeth very often.

 

note: photo of Kobe beef devoured by moi in Kobe on New Year’s Day. Seriously, you can eat that stuff with a spoon … because they cut it up into spoon sized pieces.

double note: sorry I’ve been distractelated lately. The big project is almost over. Or it could just be a little project in hindsight.

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notes to myself #166

You haven’t had the worst day of your life yet. I haven’t had it either, but I’m sure there has got to be a real doozy coming eventually.

Money Making Scheme #12

save those trees!

 

I’m going to sell pickles shaped like toothpicks and call them “Tooth Pickles”!

Possible catch phrases could be:

I think you’ve got something in your teeth. Would you like a Tooth Pickle?

or

A little peckish
What the heckish!
Tooth Pickle!
Tooth Pickle!
Tooth Pickle!

or

I’m not gerkin you around! or Takin’ the Mickle!
If it’s an edible toothpick, it’s gotta be a Tooth Pickle!

 

note:Tooth Pickles” are not to be confused with “Pickle Teeth“.

see a dentist!

 

double note: I wish I had some stuck between my teeth right now!

I wish I had some stuck between my teeth right now!

 

triple note: Money Making Scheme #1 and #2 and #3 and #4 and #5 and #6 and #7  and #8  and #9  and #10  and #11  are still scheming.

quadruple note: Don’t these just keep getting better and better? or is it just me? I could be wrong; I usually am.

 

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