Tag Archives: scratches





Does a scratched limousine have stretch marks?

Does a scratched ship have berth marks?

note: if you comment on this blog will they be re:marks?

double note: I tell people I have been in a limousine, but it was only a school bus. I stretch the truth sometimes.


Parking Lot Wanker



What’s with some people?

I parked my van in an isolated spot in the parking lot so it wouldn’t get scratched, and some loser parks right next to me. 

He or she could have parked anywhere, but no…….  they chose to be jerks and picked the spot next to me.

Look how close they parked!

They are even over the designated parking lines!

Those lines are there for a reason: they are not guidelines you can just ignore.

I spent a lot of time making my van look good:

washing:10 minutes, 2 weeks ago

detailing: spraying the rust on my rear bumper with rust protectant, emptying ashtray, and putting on a classy bumpersticker.



Yes, that’s the remnants of another classy bumpersticker: Astroboy

When I saw this after returning from making important purchases involving canned ready-to-eat products, I can assure you I examined my van closely for scratches. There were lots of scratches, but none with yellow paint. (that car’s yellow paint at least)

I was lucky this time.