Lost And Foundations

 

I guess thieves can learn a lot by watching buildings being built.

I’ve been keeping my eye on this house just in case I need some used cement.

I’m sure they will try to cover it up with a floor, but I know it’s there.

 

note: cemetaries really are cementaries.

double note: I wonder how many tools are trapped forever in the foundations of houses.

triple note:

“Dad! there is a hand sticking out of the basement floor!”

“Are the fingertips cut off?”

“Yes”

“Then don’t worry about it.”

quadruple note: see through cement would be so cool! … and dangerous.

 

notes to myself #26

The doctor isn’t going to let you keep the amazingly big clump of ear wax he washes out of your ear when you are 9.
Begging doesn’t help.

The House, The Tree, And The Rock

 

 I think these people are trying to move their house … very slowly.

 

note: if patience is a virtue, these people are very virtuous.

double note: actually they are bending the tree away from the carport area, but man they must really love that tree to put up with having to navigate the obstacle course they’ve created at their front door.

 

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Street People

Some people are very close to living on the street.

 

note: Yes! it has a very nice “frontyard” …. or 29 inches.

double note: close to shopping, schools, and the main road through the city.

triple note: “Mom, there’s a car in the living room again!”

quadruple note: I could take photos of these houses all day. The noise must be a killer; especially the ones by the traffic lights. And the image of one bad driver mowing me over while I watched tv would never be too far from my thoughts.

 

 

 

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Odd Facade

Why do people have fake brick and fake wood siding on their houses?

If I was going fake, I’d want a fake front like on a movie set; a fiberglass cartoon style like Toontown at Disneyland; or cool trick art optical illusion stuff.

If you’re going fake, go all the way!

 

note: fake “wood brick siding” in a Jenga style would look quite nice.

double note: a house made of giant Lego bricks would be too amazing!

                    “I built a 3rd floor on my house; it took 30 minutes.”

triple note: I don’t think there is enough fiberglass in most diets. In fact I don’t think there is any at all. What’s up with that?

quadruple note: Would fiberglass glasses be called fiber-optics?

 

 

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Haunted Houses

I think everyone knows where a haunted house is.
The scary house with all those untraceable stories surrounding it: sitting empty for years collecting rumours while the paint fades.
When I was 18, and too young to get into the bars yet, my friends and myself explored local haunted houses.

In the first we just found an empty house with empty beer bottles, old Playboy magazines, and cigarette butts in the basement.

The second was at one time supposedly owned by a lady with no legs. Sure enough we found a rope hanging over the bathtub, so she could lower herself in!

The third was the scariest: out in the country, locked gate, and a 400 yard (meter) walk to the house. We checked the electricity meter to make sure no one had moved in recently. We broke a window (I’m not proud now) and went in.
The house was empty, except for a rolled up foamy mattress rolled up in a corner of one room.

What was inside the mattress?

An ax, a big knife, and a saw!!!

We ran away screaming like little girls being chased by spiders.