Tag Archives: drinking

Drinking

 

Drinking responsibly in the morning doesn’t sound right.

 

note: I don’t drink in the morning; that spot’s reserved for hangovers … or feeling healthy and sober.

double note: why are there “children’s aspirin” … children shouldn’t be waking up with hangovers.

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Today #210

Today I came home from a kindergarten visit, removed my sweaty shirt and saw weird red marks on my stomach. I went to the bathroom mirror to investigate further … and saw a 4 year old’s handprint on my stomach. That little girl must have smacked me pretty hard: it’s still visible 12 hours later!
(it’s like an aboriginal kindergarten cave painting, but on my stomach)

Happy Island

I have spent many nights on Happy Island, but mornings usually find me hungover and washed up on broke reef.

 

note: it is a pretty cool name for a liquor store though.

 

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Dental Floss

 

If dental floss gets stuck between your teeth, what do you use to get it out; more dental floss?

It would be great if this was the solution for all problems:

– Have a flat tire … make it flatter … good as new!

– Drank too much … drink more … sober in no time!

– Lost money gambling … lose more … jackpot!

– Burnt your dinner … burn it more … mmm delicious!

note: Don’t like this blog … don’t like it more … ah! that’s better!

 

 

http://humor-blogs.com/

Meetings

 

 

I’ve been listening to people making speeches for over an hour now.

When are they going to bring out the bread?

Stupid Toastmasters’ meeting.

 

note: In some countries it’s rude if you don’t make eye contact while making a toast. That’s why I always have a mirror with me.

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