Tag Archives: belly buttons



Your belly button is really an afterbirthmark.


note: a belly button is a navelty of sorts.

double note: why do people put so many belly buttons on snowmen?

triple note: people born without any birthmarks must get marked up later I guess.


Today #6

Today was like watching paint not dry.

Belly Buttons

I always try to learn the word for belly button in different languages.


 I am terrible at learning languages, but one word isn’t so bad to remember.


 It appeals to my sense of the trivial.


I’m not going to list all the different words because I would embarrass myself trying to spell them.


 You will have to take my word for it.

No Belly Button

When I was born, the doctor stole my mother’s belly button.
The doctor offered to remove the excess skin my mother had accumulated in the stomach area from pumping out so many kids.
In the bargain he removed her belly button as well.
To be fair, this was in pre-cosmetic surgery days; and my mother wasn’t big on bikinis anyway.
I remember being called a liar in 1st grade by my doubting friends.
I dragged some of them back to my place after school and begged my mother to show her buttonless midriff to my friends.
She didn’t.
But she did confirm my story as true.
It would have been better if she had shown it though.