Forgetting Words

 

 

People who partially forget a word but still try to include a portion of it into a conversation are not fooling anyone.

For example, please refrain from using these utterances when speaking: alwaysthinktheyaresickiacs, firomaniacs, or spiderphobia.

These people should really open a word definitionary a little more often.

note: I thought of this while suffering from cantsleepnia.

http://humor-blogs.com/

The Tunnel

 

There is an 11 km long tunnel near my place.

I usually only drive through it in the summer when I make the 2 hour trip to the nearest beach.

Tunnels affect drivers in different ways: some people keep a constant speed, some slow down, and some speed up.

I’m a speeder!

One way traffic, no cops, and the slight claustrophobic effect makes me press that pedal down.

What do you do in tunnels?

note: I must have tunnel vision.

A Tight Call

 

I bet claustrophobics were happy when cell phones came out.

No more squeezing into small phone booths.

Now, if only something could be done about photo booths and elevators.

note: Do claustrophobics prefer cremation over burial?

double note: If you are afraid of Santa, are you a “Santa Claustrophobic”?

(I thought the “Santa” comment was original, but again I was disappointed)

 

http://humor-blogs.com/

Fear

I’m not afraid of too many things.
I’m fine with heights, small spaces, spiders, and the dark.

I’m scared of monkeys.

More specifically, I’m afraid they will jump up and scratch my eyes out.

There are monkeys close to where I live in Japan.

As long as the monkeys or myself are in a cage, I’m fine.
“Haha, look at the funny monkeys. How cute.”

But when there is no barrier between us, I don’t think they are funny or cute anymore.

I knew a guy at University; 6’7″ (about 2 meters tall) and big: fighting big!
He was afraid of toenails.
You could chase him around all day with a freshly clipped toenail.

Now that’s a funny fear.

Unless they are monkey toenails.