Plot Summary

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I’m growing vegetables this year.

Not full scale, but half scale:
… the vegetables will be ordinary size hopefully, it’s just …

I’m using a small piece of a friend’s garden plot … I guess mine is a subplot.
… but that’s another story.

If I can farm then I will be a farmer.
And if I can farm really well maybe one day I will be the farmest!

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note: nature vs. nurture? … I think growing things is a case where both work together.

double note: what comes around grows around.

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what I’m listening to now #46: Peter Gabriel “Digging in the Dirt“.

Swimming Against The Grain

 

Fields are like pools:

if you aren’t sure of your ability, stay at the fallow end.

 

note: I guess the life preserver is for sticky rice situations. (groan)

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Today #230

Today was like a piece of string with no kitten,
but definitely not like a kitten with no piece of string.

Giant Outdoor Litterbox

This is how to make a giant outdoor litterbox outside of your house. (making a giant outdoor litterbox inside your house may prove more difficult)

 

First: choose a location.

Second: make a border using something. I used the natural rocks found nearby on top of the area.

Third: add soil. If you add regular dirt or cat litter, that’s okay … because it will become soiled eventually.

And that’s about it.

I guess cats will probably get involved at some point, but you don’t need any of your own.
To bastardize  a line from Shoeless Joe by W. P. Kinsella:

If you build it, they will come.

 

note: I put flowers in my giant outdoor litterbox while I wait for those cats.

double note: a big thank you to Mr. Pettit  for suggesting this rental property improvement … eventhough he didn’t do any of the work!
… why do I feel like “The Little Red Hen“?

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Today #197

I was more outvolved in today than involved.

Transient Trees

 

Across the street from where I live, there is a transient tree depot.

The trees appear, hang out for 6 or 8 months, and then disappear.
The cycle usually starts over again after 4 months.

I don’t know where they come from, and I don’t where they go.

I’m stumped:

… except for the stump on the right … that’s doesn’t go anywhere.

 

note: no one wants the runt of the litter … or the stump of the littoral … I guess.

double note: it took me about a year to figure out what was happening over there … the big machinery transplanting them onto big trucks was a bit of a give away.

triple note: do people in big cities use the expression, “my neck of the woods“? … if they don’t, they must be more monocultured than mixed cultured … like those people with woods and necks and stuff.

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Today #177

Today someone said it was Good Friday. I told them every Friday was pretty good for me.

Japanese Stone Lanterns

 

When I see these old stone lanterns, I always stop and stare at them for a while.

Some people probably think I’m interested in old stone lanterns or art.
Some people might think I’m reflecting on some deep universal riddle.
Some people may think I’m pondering about what life was like for the artists who created these things.

None of that’s true though.

I’m just thinking if my head would fit in the hole … and whether I could push the whole thing over if I wanted to.

Some people think some pretty weird stuff.

 

note:  Coleman® stoves don’t use coal for some reason.

double note: this lantern had a guard cat … guarding it.

triple note: is the whole alphabet copyrighted and trademarked? … or just ® and ©? … I want the “P” in a circle … so I can I get some money back from parking lots.

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Today #171

Today I remembered the old “pretend to crack an egg on a kid’s head” trick. Tap a kid on the head with a knuckle and then run fingers down the side of the kid’s head lightly, like it’s an egg running down their head. It still has the same effect as when it was done to me as a kid: amazement, screams, and then a “do it again” expression on the kid’s face.

Lately

 

Lately I’ve been disregardening.

 

note: the only things growing in my yard are the pile of leaves, the number of dead flowers, and what the nextdoor neighbour’s cat has been daily  “deposhitting” on the lawn.

double note: it’s the usual suspect  again … and again … and again …

triple note: sorry I haven’t been making my usual rounds … still mildly unmotivated by whatever I have. I think it’s slowly going away … or coming back … depending on what I’m talking about.

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notes to myself #65

Kraft Dinner never loses it’s magic.

Genetic Challenges

Just when you think you’ve got all your genetic coding figured out and you think you know who you are … something like “time release DNA” or “retro-chromosomes” kick in and you find yourself … gardening!!! … like your mother!!!

Not as well as your mother, but there is still time.

I turned a blind eye when one brother started canning vegetables … from his garden.

I turned another blind eye when another brother had a dreamy look in his eye while bragging about the free soil he scored from a local mushroom farm.

My sisters? … well … they don’t brag about their gardening exploits like my brothers do. 

I’ve run out of blind eyes and can only give myself a squinty look in the mirror when facing the fact that I’m on the slippery slope to enjoying gardening.

My mother would be proud … but critical … and probably trying to plant raspberries.

 

note: in case you’ve never seen where I live, here’s a photo of the rental plantation.

 

double note: I don’t know how the van … or cool BBQ got into this photo … honest!

 triple note: my next door neighbour is tutoring me in the ways of the garden … and composting.

quadruple note: it’s another night of 2 posts!  It must be the weekend … but I always think of it as the strong end.

 

http://humor-blogs.com/

Ugly Flowers

 

It must be tough being an ugly flower.

If I was one, I’d probably just try to pass myself off as a beautiful weed.

 

note: ugly weeds definitely have it the worst.

double note: these flowers don’t look ugly, but their personalities suck.

 

http://humor-blogs.com/

When I’m Not Blogging, I Possibly Visited … (Part 1)

It was a hard 7 day week of travel: most of the places I visited were 5 or 6 traffic jams away from each other.
Sure Japan looks small on a map, but when you are here it’s a lot bigger.

Like any good trip in my van, it started with a trip to the hardware store for cheap oil to replace the other cheap oil I burn off while driving at highspeeds of up to 75 mph/120 km per hour … sometimes in only 50 or so minutes.

Two hours in to the voyage the van suffered a flat tire … conveniently in a “Road Side Service Area” with a gas station that had a hydraulic jack I could borrow: my jack wasn’t worth … jack.

midnote: this bike is not my van, but I feel it’s pain.

midnote note: this car isn’t my van either.

 

After that it was smooth sailing on 3 winter and 1 summer tire for the rest of the trip: the van was unseasonably well equipped I guess.

 

First Stop: Kanazawa, Ishikawa Prefecture.

 

I was there at the same time last year. I stayed at the same hotel and they even remembered me … probably because I was wearing the exact same clothes as last year … sadly  … or maybe because they could finally collect the money I owed from the mini-bar bill left unpaid.

another midnote: I don’t usually go to mini-bars … they are small and cramped.

another midnote note: I didn’t really have an unpaid mini-bar bill. I just like the idea of hanging out in a mini-bar.

Known for one of the 3 best gardens in Japan (excluding mine), Kenrokuen  is pretty cool.

 

The garden looked exactly the same as last year … maybe because I was there on the same day as last year.

Same staff: I never forget a hat.

NO! You are not doing it right! Once more from the top!

That’s better!

The fashion police eventually arrested this woman.

 

I revisited the  21st Century Museum  too. Last year there was the amazing Ron Mueck‘s work on display.

 

This isn’t Ron Mueck’s stuff; it’s something else.
I’m not sure what it is, but it looked like the artist was still working on it.

 

This is a close up of one section. If you look really closely, it kind of looks like the inside of my head or junk or both or none. It must be the work of a foreign artist because Japan has different electrical plugs.

And that was about it for Kanazawa this year. I had schedules and deadlines to not meet, but try for anyway.

last midnote: I’ll tell you what happens next … next.

last midnote note: oh yeah! There is a castle in Kanazawa as well.

 

note: I saw the same great roots  as last year at Kenrokuen Garden … and took another picture of them. I am very predictable when I visit places more than once at the same time … … … … of year.

double note: if you don’t know about my love affair with roots, it’s all revealed here.

 

http://humor-blogs.com/

Out Of Sight, Out Of My Mind

 

Nice day,  innit?

Tammy  over at The Tessarae  wondered if I missed anyone while I was off on vacation.

“Missed” is a pretty strong word, … so is “strong” or “blue cheese“.

Did I think of any of you at all a little bit even fleetingly on my excursion? No, not a bit.

I didn’t think of S. Le  over at I Feel Unusual  at all … which is unusual.

 

 I definitely didn’t think of S. Le‘s witty line to Cynical Scribble  about “alcologic“.

 Tammy   never passed through my mind at all while taking this shot of flowers by a strange bridge thingey.

 

 

 Tacky Raccoons   was the furthest thing from my thoughts, although I thought about his cousin the Drunk Tanuki a little.

 

 Epicurienne   didn’t cross my mind or palate.

 

Bonnie Luria   never crossed my palette or my mind.

 

 sweetiegirlz   and her old buildings never entered my head once.

 

 

 w1kkp  and her photos of normal from a different angle didn’t enter my head once with this shot looking up into the sky over ground zero in Hiroshima.

I must have had amnesia about Buck Frain  while snapping this shot of an art poster outside of … someplace … somewhere.

 

 razzbuffnik   never floated through my head while taking this shot of the floating torii at Miyajima. It only floats when the tide’s in though I guess.

 

 Dennis the Vizsla  never entered the doggie door in my head while I snapped this one.

 Turkish Prawn  and Prairie Flounder  were completely absent while looking at the seriously old guns from the 1500’s tucked away inside Matsumoto Castle.

 

I really didn’t think of Doraz  while extremely happy and warm and fuzzy.

 

I didn’t even remember Hot Lard  while taking this one … which is very difficult to do … because they are just rude.

 

I did think about Jim’s Muse  though.

… and Tony  was always a little out of my mind … but I’ve deleted those photos.

I usually just thought about myself the whole entire time.

 

note: I “heart” all of you  in my blogroll … in a manly non-physical way.

 

double note: I’ve missed out a lot of people on the blogroll. I thought of you constantly, but didn’t take any photos … of  skittles, very strangely organized stuff, funny wordplays, penguins, etc … . (sad face)

triple note: I’m sorry if I haven’t caught up on all your blogs, I will shortly (smiley face)

quadruple note: if I’ve offended anyone by not mentioning them, I haven’t meant to.

 

http://humor-blogs.com/