Arriving Non-Expectedly

 

“It’s about time” someone did something about those “it’s about time” late for work people!

Obviously they think it’s not about time for a change.

 

note: people who arrive late for work bother me in an “around about” sort of way.

double note: if you come to work late approximately one more time you will kind of be fired.

triple note: people who are always late are “time zoned out” or “timeless” or something like that.

quadruple note: I was going to call this one “Re: Tardiness” … but thought someone might jump to the wrong definition in the dictionary … or conclusion … or just jump for some reason.

 

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In My Dreams … #3

 

In my dreams I don’t know what I look like; I never seem to have a mirror.

Other people are no help at all … they aren’t carrying  mirrors either.

 

note: photo taken in one of the DisneySea sections.

double note: #1  and #2  are still slumbering along.

 

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Simply Divine

 

 

note: in the winter it looks like an exoskeleton.

double note: I’m off for a 3 day weekend: possibly the beach will be involved. Have a great weekend! See you next week.

triple note: this is definitely a houseplant.

 

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Still More Really Bad Things

These things would also still be really bad:

– youtuberculosis

– a pipe dreamcatcher

– a lemonstration

– SpongeBob SquarePanty lines

– a wire tapioca pudding

– vending machine guns

– a gummy bearskin rug

– a flying saucercumcision

– heretic tacs

– a beatnik knack

– a commuter train of thought

– alkaline dancing … or just line dancing

– an absolooting

– a Welcome Back cotter pin

– a time share cropper

– having a hobby hoarse throat

– obscurvy

– kangarulers

– a suicide salad

– a punctured eardrum kit

– a saltwatermelon

– a tuna meltdown

– cheetah tahs!

– a chocolate barstool pigeon

– a toxic waste band

– a daffodil pickle

– a combination lockness monster

– a window psilocybin mushroom omeletter of recommendation

 

note: I do have “a coffee mugging” … now!

double note:  Really Bad Things  and More Really Bad Things  are still fake furmenting.

triple note:

quadruple note: sorry I haven’t been frequenting all your awesome blogs … frequently and on a regular basis non sporadically: “hit shappens” or something like that. Bork is a Witch!

 

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Living On The Edge

 

I’ve been living on the edge for a long time now;

… or maybe it’s just the periphery.

 

note: I usually get “peripherential treatment” most of the time.

double note: being sidelined on an unlined piece of paper is difficult.

triple note: I’m not marginal! … I’m butteral.

quadruple note: a false prophet is just a “pocketfisher of men” … or a false profit … or a pocket fissure … or something like that.

 

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Confrontationalizing

 

note: the opposite of “confrontational” should be “prorearational“:
non-confrontrational is just confusing or maybe even proseparating.

double note: if he was a pie, he’d be in your face.

 

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Sticks

 

I’m glad I’m not a stick

… because I don’t think sticks can drink chocolate milk.

 

note: if I was a pizza, I’d be a cannibal.

double note: How big does a stick have to be before it becomes a log?

 

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Chinese Characters

 

If I was a Chinese character, I’d want to be Arnold from Happy Days or else that guy from The Karate Kid.

 

note: the above drawing is a fictional Chinese character: it means “a lot” to me.

 

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A Subtle Difference

 

I’m lucky.

I wear what I like to work:

but …

to avoid becoming too casual I always do up one more button on my shirt when I go to work, and undo it again when I leave work.

You’d think people wouldn’t notice this little difference, but they do!

… maybe it’s because my shirts only have one button on them.

 

note: I’m a dress decoder.

double note: Who wears “attire“? … apart from the Michelin Man … or “Bibendum” to people in the know.

triple note: the photo has nothing to do with buttons or being lucky or subtlety or the Michelin Man … it’s just my most recent cactus/cacti purchase from a few weeks back.

quadruple note: I may have put on 3 entries tonight … and one this afternoon. If you are inclined (or just standing straight), please feel free to peruse my humble offerings … or just look at all the crap anyway.

 

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Excessivism

 

Eating more than you should may save you from leftovers;

but …

drinking more than you should will never save you from hangovers.

 

note: hangovers are just leftovers that you don’t want … and you can’t stick them in to tupperware and hide them at the back of the fridge!

double note: hangunders are just fine.

triple note: being hungunder just means you are over the weather.

quadruple note: photo taken in some Irish Pub in Cusco, Peru in 2006. She’s just faking wastedness. I’m sure I saw her on a table later … and up a lot earlier than me the next day. The Dutch don’t do hangovers.

 

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