If I Had 3 Eyes, …

 little green man wind-up


If I had 3 eyes, …

I’d probably wear a hat instead of sunglasses.

I’d hope one eye was blind so I could wear an eye patch.

“trinocular vision” might be difficult to get used to.

I’d hope one wasn’t on my ass … because then I’d have to cut a little hole in my pants to see anything.

would people call me 6 eyes if I wore glasses?

eye tests would be interesting!

I’d probably get sick of  the “little green men” costume on Halloween.

I might say “See you later … and later … and later” just for fun.

I’d yell “Come on ref! Do you only have 2 eyes or something!” at sporting events.

I could have a lucrative career as an actor … in horror movies.

I’d probably have to tell people, “No I don’t have eyes in the back of my head; just 3 up front”.

binoculars would be a bitch, but telescopes would be no problem.

I’d have bags under all 3 of them probably.

I’d hope they were all the same color.

if the 3rd one was on my ass I’d hope it didn’t have an eyebrow too … because that could get itchy.

I’d be an open target for that 3 Stooges “eye poke” routine.

I might sell one on e-bay if times got hard.

I bet my nickname at school would be “Eye Soceles” or maybe just “Triangle”.

I’d hope my eyelids blinked at the same time!


note: If I met someone with 4 eyes, I’d be envious.



4 responses to “If I Had 3 Eyes, …

  1. Don’t forget Blinky, the irradiated fish from the Simpsons. And this.

  2. Wink, Wink, Wink….
    A sequential wink would be awesome.

  3. If it were on the tip of one of your fingers, you could be your very own little periscope! How cool would that be!!!
    Not to mention the voyeuristic implications. No eye would have worn the name peeper better (not that you would ever use it that fashion.)
    “Eye Soceles” – wicked!!! 🙂

  4. Thanks for the comments.

    pannonica: Blinky’s my favourite! That’s a very cool camera too!

    prairieflounder: a sequential wink with the accompanying sound of a finger roll on a table would be very fine.

    nathaliewithanh:Peeper” would be a good name, but “Perry” would work as well.

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