Burton Cummings Owes Me $1.07 Canadian



An Open Letter To Burton Cummings:

You owe me $1.07 Canadian for the newspaper you took and promised to come back and pay for.

Did you think I wouldn’t mind putting $1.07 Canadian of my own money in to the cash register at the end of my shift so the till balanced?
Did you think you could screw me over and I would eventually forget about the 1993 Times Colonist May 2nd Sunday Edition with the big real estate insert, the Islander magazine, and the colored comics?

Just because 8 million years ago you were famous and probably still get royalty checks everytime Lenny Kravitz sings “American Woman“, doesn’t give you the right to escape justice for newspaper theft.
You probably don’t even have the newspaper any more! I don’t want it back anyway.

I want my $1.07 Canadian adjusted for inflation and the 15 years of compound interest that I have missed out on. You now owe me $1.12 Canadian.


P.S. Your mustache looks funny.

note: I do like Burton Cummings. This is just humor. He did cadge a newspaper off of me; if he came back and paid, I never heard about it.



5 responses to “Burton Cummings Owes Me $1.07 Canadian

  1. Well, I’ll never borrow anything from YOU!

    prometheuscomic: I just thought I needed to put a little edge into the blog. I don’t want other bloggers to think that I’m soft.
    To be fair, I was probably eating a chocolate bar or a bag of chips that I hadn’t paid for when I had my brush with fame.

  2. You do seem to have a long, bitter memory!

    I think he looks like a porn star.

  3. It’s not just the moustache that looks funny; his hair is so greasy from whatever cooking oil he put in it that he needs a good old Japanese hot tub. With head dunk. And extra hot. Almost scalding. Make that scalding.
    Ick. Who is this guy, anyway? Forgive me; I’m a Kiwi.

    epicurienne: Burton Cummings was the lead singer for “The Guess Who” in the 70’s and then had a successful solo career in the late 70’s early 80’s (in North America at least). “The Guess Who” are the original “American Woman” singers. I think everyone knows that song: also, re-done by Lenny Kravitz for “Austin Power: The Spy Who Shagged Me“.

  4. Edgy, made me look. I figured he must have taken $1US from you until I read more.

  5. Saskboy: thanks for stopping by.
    This entry was out of the ordinary for me. I’m over the $1.07 which is probably up to $1.13 now.

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