Waiting For God Knows



I was waiting with all the old people for a store to open this morning.

Don’t old people have anything else to do other than stand around and wait for stuff?

They always seem to be waiting for the newspaper, the mail, the bus, …

Old people must be really patient or don’t sleep or something.

They should have been pounding on the store window yelling, “Hurry up! I’m dying out here. I don’t have much time. I can’t wait any longer. You’re going to lose a sale, if you’re not quick!“.


I’m not old.

I had an important reason for being at the store before it opened:

I woke up early and had nothing better to do.



note: I’m going to buy everything with a credit card when I start getting shaky.

note to old people: You’ve waited all your life to be old, savour the moment: just not at the check-out counting change.



11 responses to “Waiting For God Knows

  1. I have a friend who’s 93 he’s been waiting a long time to get old, he refers to people in their 70’s & 80’s as young’ns

  2. Um. PlanetRoss? Now, where is my ruler left over from a gazillion years of catholic nuns so I can rap you on the knuckles!

    You really do deserve the Big Meanie for this entry! We can’t help it if our change is loose and we are dying, cheeseman. A credit card? The answer to your future “shakiness”?

    Have you read the papers? Credit isn’t exactly in great supply world wide.

    You may be standing in line next to us with only change in your pocket before you know it!

    Aaarghh! Now where’s an animated emoticon when I need one?

  3. Way to go Planet on the Nomination!
    By the way, how did you start blogging?

  4. I thought all Japanese folks after they reached 70 went to the mountains where they WAIT to die of starvation . It’s called Ubasuteyama. I saw it in a movie. It must be true.

    Willy Badger, you look quite preppy these days I must say.

  5. Bad Ross. I guess your knuckles are still sore from Pat’s rapping them. However, where I live, there’s the problem of walking down people-dense footpaths and being barged by prams. I swear to God some of those prams don’t have babies in them; they’re just devised to ram people like me so the pram owners get where they’re going faster. However, imagine my disappointment when I realised that octogenarians had joined the pram-ramming crew and are (in our area, at least) using their Zimmerframes or shopping trolleys to ram people out of the way! As a many-time victim, I can say that I am disappointed that the old manners brigade have felt it necessary to lose their manners in order to get by. As I said, that’s just one area of London, but it’s sweet-looking old people I’m talking about here!

  6. Maybe some of the people misunderstood your blog here. I completely got it (but that’s probably because I know you much better).

    I just wrote about 5 sentences about your personality and lifestyle that fit part and parcel with elderly people but I thought I best not mention anything. Ooooops. 😉

  7. I’ve been waiting most of my life. I don’t think it will be much different when I get old. I hope I still like sleeping-in though, because it would be a shame to not be able to sleep-in when you really don’t have anywhere to be.

  8. Darn only 22 years to go the it’s Ubasuteyama time. At least you get longer to live than the 30 year olds in Logans Run

  9. Oh i got it wrong they only made it to 21, my memory is failing

  10. Thanks for all the great comments!

    Tony: you are right about Logan’s Run: it was 30 years old in the movie.

    cherikooka: I think people sleep less when they get older or go to bed earlier or something like that. Someone should be studying these old people! hee hee
    *(sorry I didn’t do the meme)

    Kelly Pettit: I know your position very well you young whippersnapper.

    Everyone: Kelly Pettit insists I am the oldest young person he knows. Or is it the youngest old person he knows? I keep forgetting.

    epicurienne: I once rode in a pram. Or was it a streetcar? It had a wobbly wheel I think.

    nathaliewithanh: Yes, 70 year old Japanese people go to Ubasuteyama to die of starvation. But then they get hungry and bored so they go travelling and eat healthy food for the next 30 years.

    Willy Badger: I started blogging on a porn site. You know that.

    w1kkp: You know I’m just kidding. I like old people: they are so cute and cuddly and some of them say the funniest things. hee hee

    I plan to not have pockets if I get old. I’ll keep my change in a brown paper bag wrapped in a plastic bag just in case it rains. Or stick it behind my ear with my gum.

  11. I didn’t know you were kidding. Honest. You had another post a while back about old people growing to the ground or something, based on a picture of an elderly lady literally bent over with osteoporosis and I left a comment about that one too, but I think you thought I was kidding!

    ’round and ’round we go, eh? Humor is easy to be misunderstood though and I do know you’ve got a good heart so maybe I was just being cranky!! I hold that in a plastic bag most of the time, too, along with spare change.

    w1kkp: I only try to be funny or humorous: sometimes I’m not, or only to some. I don’t have anything against the elderly. I hope to be one someday.

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