Educational Crap

 

In the entrance to one of the kindergartens I visit are educational posters about: body parts, healthy food, litter, crossing roads, …

The above poster was up for a few weeks before it was replaced with something else.

Can you guess what it’s about?

…

How about now?

 

I don’t make this stuff up! … I just record the evidence.

 

note: I only make stuff up when there is no evidence … or when I feel like it.

double note: Yes I’m toilet humormongering again, … but this is educational!

triple note: I think there are more than 3 types … but that’s just me. I could be wrong: I usually am.

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notes to myself #77

You will never retrieve that penny you swallowed.

Sushi

 

Are there any sushi sous chefs?

I hope not …

because that’s really hard to say.

 

note: some people like to make a big production line when serving sushi.

double note: conveyor belt sushi/rolling sushi/kaiten zushi … whatever you call it, I consider it hunting.

triple note: if you don’t see what you like … special orders arrive by bullet train/shinkansen on the overhead tracks.

quadruple note:  the coolest part about these restaurants is they just count all the empty plates to see how much your bill is.
… in a perfect world they would do something similar at places selling chicken wings … and maybe at rib restaurants too.

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notes to myself #76

Do not sniff the bleach bottle in the laundry room.

Some Days #2

 

note: I’m not sure if I took one of those pills that makes you smaller or the sofa took one of those pills to make it bigger.

double note: if I was a boss, I’d want one of these in my office.

triple note: I’m not small minded … I just have a big head.

quadruple note: whenever I feel small and insignificant … I go to miniature world.

quintuple note: the first “Some Days“ was on another day over here.

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notes to myself #75

You are never even close to being the shortest kid in class. You are back row for all of the elementary school pictures.

Holiday Seasonal Work

 

 

 note: possibly the little drummer boy does most of the work.

double note: old supermodels don’t retire … they just go into other fields.

triple note: some people really make a nativity scene in public.

quadruple note: I guess it’s stable work.

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notes to myself #74

You grow up before movie cameras are commonplace and your parents don’t take that many embarrassing pictures of you.

The Regenerating Toothbrush Analogy

Day 1: A broken toothbrush is like a sprained wrist: it’s useless.

Day 2: It’s still pretty useless, but can be used in emergency situations. Pain will be involved.

Day 3: It’s functional, but I don’t want anyone to see me use it. It still has problems with hard to reach areas.

Day 4: It’s starting to resemble it’s former self. If you don’t look too closely at it … or use it too much, you wouldn’t know it wasn’t 100% yet.

Day ???: It works great and will be severely underappreciated once again.

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note:

Things I couldn’t do with my right wrist and hand on Day 1

- start my van

- hold anything heavier than air

- negotiate buttons, unscrew jar lids, or wash the left side of my body properly

double note: on Day 1 it hurt like hell … but I rolled up my sleeve (a co-worker rolled up the other one for me) and I carried on.

triple note: spraining a wrist hurts, but I’m sure any body part … or anybody’s part of their body would be the same … or similar but in a different area and with a different function … or it might be worse.
Things can always be worse, but they can always be better too!

quadruple note: negotiating with buttons doesn’t work … getting mad, pleading, making promises, and crying don’t work either.

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notes to myself #73

One of your arms breaks when you are 18 months old … after that you just seem to bend stuff.

Misterious

 

 

 

Mist is foggerious.

… or something like that.

 

note: when I can see my breath on a cold day is that ex-hail?

double note: steam is just hot water with no attention span.

triple note: the right wrist is mildly better. I think I may blog about it next.

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notes to myself #72

Hayley Mills made “The Parent Trap” 4 years before you were born: it’s not meant to be … let it go.
You’re not going to get together … yeah yeah yeah.